Forgiveness, Compassion, and Reconciliation
We kicked off 2023 with a bang! Gina Bell taught us all about forgiveness and reconciliation through her ESPERE training. We welcomed over 90 women to this event and had magical intentional conversations with one another. If you missed it, follow along with the slides below.
This was a brave space full of vulnerability.
Because of the nature of this topic, confidentiality was a must! The notes below are to help you understand the details of forgiveness. But the details of this night will remain with those who were in attendance.
ESPERE: This overview is part of a greater 32 hour training.
The goal is to manage conflict with compassion and understanding.
Forgiveness is a basic human need. Not one person is exempt from this rule. Non-violence is the way. Without these values, a culture of compassion can not exist.
Resentment Holds Weight
What do you carry around with you? The weight of our past and resentment builds without forgiveness. Gina gave us the example of a sack of potatoes. Each potato is a specific experience you had. When we carry the resentment along with us from every experience, the bag of potatoes becomes increasingly heavy. Every person has their own heavy bag of potatoes.
What is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is a normal part of our lives
Forgiveness is a process that can be encouraged but not forced
Entails changing the perceptions and assumptions we have of those who have harmed us.
Helps us to no longer be victims of our circumstances and transforms us into creators of a new reality.
Changes our interpretation of and relationship with our past.
Forgiveness is a self-healing process
What forgiveness is not…
Forgiveness is not forgetting nor justifying the offense
Forgiveness is not necessarily reestablishing a close relationship with the offending person.
Forgiveness is not hiding the anger and pain we feel
It is not allowing our offenders to continue offending us.
Forgiveness Cannot Happen if the Hurting is Still Occurring
While we strive to forgive in every situation, we can not begin the process for an event that is still occurring. If we are in the thick of these moments of hurt and resentment, we are too close to the action to be able to start forgiving.